Ch. 31 (Closer)
-After downing five Melted Snowmans at a sportsbar, I caught a girl staring at me from the shuffleboard table.
-She walked over to me, introducing herself as Sugar.
-I ended up taking her home.
-One thing led to another, and we had sex at my place.
-I found myself thinking about Lyn the whole time, forcing me to stop in the middle of the act and calling the girl a cab.
-After being bombarded with bittersweet memories and regret in the morning, I decided to go for a drive.
-I pulled up to a house that I haven't been to in six months.
*Strong language*
Location: 2097 Edgewood Road
Date: Tuesday, 11/1/11
Time: 10:47 a.m.
I can't tell if he's dead or if he's merely immobilized by his drunken stupor. Either way, this isn't the first time I've seen him like this. I can probably count on one hand how many times I remember seeing him sober...or coherent. Being around him is like being locked in a room with a swarm of bees. I know they can hurt me, so I have to be careful and not agitate them, since they also possess my only source of nourishment. I have to choose my words and movements carefully, treading that fine line between absolute fear and absolute hatred for the predicament I'm in. I'm stuck, yet thats the only thing I know. That's the only thing I expect. All I can really do is anticipate that moment when I have a small window of escape, but I don't know when that will happen.
"Dad....wake up..." On my knees, I gently nudge the arm that's hanging loosely over the cushion. When he doesn't respond, I lean closer so he can hear me. "Dad!"
A scowl takes over his face as he lets out an annoyed grunt, as if a fly has been buzzing over him for a while, interrupting his sleep. Great. He's not dead. Maybe he should be. He's been marinating in liquor since I learned how to say "daddy". I don't remember him ever giving me a bottle of milk or changing my diaper but he always had his own bottle in hand. I can still remember how bitter vodka tasted when I was five years old, when my curiousity got the best of me. I was fascinated by this transparent bottle filled with clear liquid, wondering why it took so long for my dad to finish it. It looked like water, but it tasted nothing like it. It was bitter, it burned my throat, it made me cough and it made me feel sleepy afterwards. I never understood why my mom got so upset about this. I also never understood why my dad smacked her in the face a few minutes later.
"Leave me alone..." He mumbles as he shifts on his side before slowly opening his eyes. They are bloodshot, empty and inconvenienced by my presence.
As he sits up straight, his eyes focus on the inconsequential ramblings of the sports anchor, who is reviewing the highlights of this week's football games. I sit as close to the edge of the couch as possible. That way, I won't have to be uncomfortably aware of his nearness, and I can avoid that awkward eye contact that just makes my skin crawl.
"So the Llamas beat the Cowdevils." He comments, but he never averts his gaze from the t.v.
"Yeah, I guess so." My left foot fidgets as I try to ignore the foul stench harassing my nose. I don't know if it's the damp air circulating in the living room, the old take-out boxes sitting on the coffee table for God knows how long or the fact that my father probably hasn't showered in a week, based on the grease stains and dried sweat emanating from his black tank top.
"Mm-hmm..." A soft grunt escapes his lips, as if forming a whole word is too much trouble and a mere waste of energy.
My first instinct is to just walk out the door and never come back. What's the point? Why am I here? If he's just going to waste his life away, why bother checking on him in the first place? It's not like I have a relationship with him. It's not like we have meaningful conversations where he acts remotely interested in my success or the events in my life. He'd have to be sober to do that. But I can't bring myself to leave him like this, even though he created his own mess, the same way I created mine. As big of an asshole as he is, and despite the number of ways he has failed me, he is still my dad.
In a strange way, I understand why he's like this. I may never know the reasons that made him resort to alcohol, but I know its purpose. It has a magical way of making things okay, even though I'm drowning in my own self-hatred and self-delusions. But it can also warp my sense of reality.
"Dad, you need to lay off the liquor." I mutter as I pick up the trash littered all over the coffee table and grungy carpet. How can he live like this?
"I don't need no goddamn lectures."
Ever since my mom left, I was forced to take on the role of caretaker. I don't know how my dad maintained a job growing up, but when he came home, he was inherently useless. He would sit on the couch with his bottle in hand, and stare at the t.v. like a zombie. It got to the point where the closest thing J.C. had to a real meal was the cafeteria food at school. I wasn't ready to be responsible, nor did I find it fair that I had to step up and help take care of this family, but I had no choice. The thought of my brother and I being split up because of an incompetent father was too massive of a fear to ignore. I taught myself to cook, keep up my grades, get a scholarship from playing football, hold a part-time job and make sure that my father and brother weren't stewing in their own filth.
As I dice up the wedge of processed cheese into cubes, I become bombarded by memories of that morning after Lyn and I made love for the first time. I found her standing over the stove, stirring a pot of mac and cheese, in nothing but her bra and panties. I never let girls stay the night. I usually call a cab for them afterwards when they have served their purpose. But with Lyn...I wanted to see her face when I woke up. I wanted to know if that night meant as much to her as it did to me. And when I saw her cheeks turn crimson when she turned around, eyes drenched in shy desire, I knew. I knew we shared something incredible.
"So why haven't you been visiting?" He asks as he pokes at his steaming bowl of artificially gooey mac and cheese. I can never make it quite as good as Lyn. I don't know what she puts in it, but it always comes out creamy, like it melts in your mouth. Yes, even from a box.
"I've been busy at the hospital." I reply as I take another bite. What am I supposed to say? That I'd rather eat shit than put up with more of his soul-sucking company?
"You and your brother forgot about me." He briefly looks in my direction, with his eyes narrowed, as if he's trying to illicit some sort of guilt.
"Look, he's been busy too. He's been focusing on his music."
"When is he gonna grow up and find a real job?"
After I wash the dishes, clean the counters, throw out bad food from the fridge and put the leftovers away, I walk in the living room, only to find the vodka bottle near my dad's lap again. I stashed it away in the liquor cabinet when I cleaned the living room, hoping he'll stay away from it for the rest of the day, but it looks like it found him again. This just grates on my last nerves. The reason why I made lunch is to put homemade food in his stomach and sober him up.
"You're drinking again??" I throw my hands up in frustration, shaking my head.
"I can do whatever the fuck I want."
"Give me the bottle." I hold my hand out as I walk over to him.
"No." His hand clutches the neck of the vodka bottle, its clear contents swirling around, but his eyes are still stubbornly fixated on the t.v.
"Give me the bottle!!"
"Are you telling me what to do??" He quickly raises up from the couch with his finger pointing at me. His eyes piercing through me in a menacing challenge as if I just had the audacity to speak to him as an adult.
"No, I just think you're---" The familiar fear of getting hit again forces me to lower my voice and control my emotions. He hasn't used his fist on me since high school, but everytime he raises his voice and gets this rage in his eyes, I brace myself.
"What? Drinking too much? So you think you can just come in here and tell me how I should live my life after you disappear for six months??"
"Dad, it's not like that. I'm just worried about you."
"You can save the bullshit. You don't give a fuck about me. None of you do. Your slut of a mother left me for another man and my own sons don't even bother to visit me. So stop acting like you care because we both know that's a lie!"
Is he so delusional that he thinks he's still the victim?? That my mom left him for no reason? That we don't visit him because we're such bad sons? I can feel my blood boil at the idea that he thinks he's an innocent party in all this, and he never contributed to the dysfunction of this family.
"You know what dad?? Mom left you because you beat her ass and you treated her like shit. Did you forget---"
"What?? You're defending that whore---"
"Let me finish!! For once you are going to shut the fuck up and listen. Do you fucking understand me??"
His eyes widen in shock, as if he has just been hit by a ton of bricks. But he remains silent, cautiously watching me.
"You have been drunk since I remember how to spell the word drunk. You treated all of us like shit. Mom left because she couldn't deal with you anymore. Do I agree with what she did? Of course not! I hate her fucking guts for abandoning me and J.C. You know why? Because we got stuck with you. You took your anger out on us and that wasn't fucking fair!!"
Everything comes out, and I can't stop it. All of my anger, my frustration, my regret and resentment towards my own parents rushes through my throat like vomit that's been fermenting in my stomach for years. All those times I've had to hold it in, just for the sake of being strong and sane for J.C., finally came to an end.
"Brad...." He mumbles with a pained look on his face. His eyes are shocked, offended and disarmed...by the truth.
"You know what? Do whatever you want. If you want to die early, you might as well make it easier with a gun. Save all of us the misery." It takes every fiber in my soul to hold back the tears threatening to flood my eyes. I'm not going to cry in front of this man. I refuse to let him see me like this.
"Brad, I'm sorry..."
"I'm still going to take care of your bills. But don't expect to see my face again."
I walk out the door.
"I will never bother you
I will never promise too
I will never follow you
I will never bother you
Never say a word again
I will crawl away for good"
"Pain, pain, pain
You know you're right
You know you're right
You know you're right"
Lyn. The only woman that has ever loved me. I don't exactly know what she saw in me, but she believed in me enough to become a doctor. She has put up with my bullshit for two years. And what do I do? I end up screwing her sister twice. Out of spite. I caused her to lose the baby. I caused her to leave her life behind. Now she's in some strange town, all by herself, because of me.
Luke. He has treated me no different than his own blood, like his own brothers. He has been there for me since we were little, he has seen it all, and stuck by my side. How did I show my appreciation? By screwing the girl he was in love with. Maybe I was just jealous that he has such a perfect life and comes from such a happy home. Maybe I just wanted him to get a taste of the pain I put up with everyday. Maybe I wanted him to be as miserable as I was.
There's only one way to end all this.
Location: 272 Windsor Drive
Time: 5:15 p.m.
Before embarking on my plan, I decide to stop by another house. I want to tie up all the loose ends before moving on with my life completely. Lyn left her silver La Matea at my place. The chances of her coming back for it is very slim, unless she sends someone to pick it up. But when is that going to happen? I'm not going to sit around and wait. It's only right that I bring it back. I have no use for it, and I certainly don't need another reminder of her.
I'm just going to go in there, drop the car off, and leave.
As I walk closer to the door, I can feel the endless drumming of my heart. It's been a while since I've been to this house. They have always welcomed me like I was a part of their family. I can still remember that night when I picked Lyn up for our first official date. I was so nervous about meeting her family, especially her dad. That was the first time I have ever done that. It may have seemed old-fashioned, but I actually appreciated the chivalry. It made things seem worthwhile, like I was a gentleman eagerly anticipating the opportunity to spend more time with the object of my affection. I definitely had more respect for her because of that.
Not too long after I press the doorbell, Adam opens the door. He's like a little brother to me. I swear, he always followed me around like a little puppy, always asking for my advice. He would even call me out of the blue, just to say hi.
"Hey, Brad!" His eyes widen in surprise as he flashes me a warm smile, motioning for me to come inside.
"Hey, Adam!"
Mr. Santori. The first time I met him, he scared the shit out of me. There was something about his calm, collected demeanor that spelled "screw with my daughter and you're dead". He's very protective of Lyn, and he has every right to be that way. Some of the things I did to and with girls would cause any father to form a lynch mob and come after me. I knew I couldn't mess this one up, especially after he said "take care of my daughter" before we stepped out of the house. That just made me feel like a creep, like I was out to take advantage of his little girl, and I knew I couldn't let him down.
"It's good to see you, Brad. How've you been?" He asks as he takes the spot next to me on the couch.
"I've been good, sir. Just busy at the hospital. How about you?"
"Can't complain. We're just worried about Lyn. Adam told us that she's okay but she didn't leave a number or an address where we can find her."
"Hello, Brad! What you doing here?" Mrs. Santori asks in her usual Shang Simlan accent as she walks over in our direction.
"I wanted to drop off Lyn's car. She never came back for it, so I thought I'd leave it with you." Being surrounded by Lyn's family makes it even harder for me to keep my composure. The guilt slowly gnaws away at my conscience. If they find out what I did, they will never let me escape this house alive. And it doesn't help that they treat me so well.
"That is nice of you. Thank you." A smile forms on her face as she eases down on the chair across the coffee table.
"No thought was put into this
I always knew it would come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail"
"Have you heard from Lyn?" Mrs. Santori asks. She possesses the weary eyes of a mother who has probably lost sleep over the safety of her daughter, wondering where she is and if she's okay. Even though Lyn implied that her parents don't love her, what I'm seeing today proves that's far from the truth. Even if it was true, maybe this whole event was the wake-up call that they needed.
"Well..." As I try to sort through the words coming out of my mouth, I'm torn between protecting my own ass and doing what's best for Lyn. If I tell them what happened, I will destroy whatever relationship I have left with them. They are the closest thing I have to a normal family right now. If I continue to keep up this lie, I'll have to live with myself, knowing her family is worried sick about her and I didn't help when I had the chance to.
I feel their eyes...and the whole world burning on me.
What do I do?
*Copyright 2012 Lyn C.S.* ---------------------------------------
"You Know You're Right" by Nirvana
Video by: NirvanaVEVO
You know, this explains a lot of the way Brad is, it doesn't excuse it, just gives a little perspective on where he comes from, i can't help it, i do feel for him, yes he phucked up, and bad, and Lyns' sister, i could beat her ass too.
ReplyDeleteTalking about being stuck between a rock and a hard place. If he tells them what he did i don't believe he will mention the sisters name, he will simply take the blame, and she would let him, she always seemed jealous of Lyn to me(i don't like her, can you tell=b).
Curious to see how this goes, i'm hoping Brad is just considering leaving the area, all through it sounds a little like he may want to end it period. Even though he's done some shitty things i really hope not.
Can't wait for the next chapter...edenz~
I agree, his rough childhood doesn't excuse his behavior but it does give you an idea of what shaped him into the person that he is. I feel for him too, and not in a biased author way. Just as someone who sees him as person (I know, I know, he's ficitional). I think we're all main characters in our own stories, and even the most evil people were children once. They weren't born that way.
DeleteSo you think he'll take the blame for Naveah? Hmmm...that's an interesting prediction. Huh, Naveah being jealous of Lyn. The irony since she's had it easy and she was always her parents' favorite.
Brad's plan to "end it all" can go either way. Stay tuned!
Thanks for reading, Edenz!
;Ah Ha Now we are getting to the root of things. He's so oblivious and scared of love because he never was loved as a child. The hate he has for his Father and for the way his Mother left makes him not believe in love or no what it is. Reasons why he was so scared of loving Lyn and once he did he kept running from it until he did something that would make it easier not to run anymore, which in the end back fired on him.
ReplyDeleteA child is the product of their environment they mimic what they see, and their actions stem from what they have experienced. He lived in a broken home which resulted in him never wanting settle down or get close to anyone except Lyn. Love can scare the shit out of you and make you do some crazy things especially if it's real. In Brad's case it did just that he didn't know how to cope with it so he did what he knows best to run which for him was him sleeping around.
Brad is beginning to grow it will take time but he is getting there. Time heals all wounds. I do believe that him and Lyn need to see each other for closure, that will happen in due time. He also needs to get his best friend back, It's not reason to keep the negativity aspiring. I'm proud of him for taking her car back. He does need to be honest and tell the truth but also tell her family he is growing up and has changed as well. Hopefully they won't hate him to much.
Brad-O is getting there; It takes time but he's walking in the right path.
I'm starting to like him again. Only a little lol. :-D
Wow, Sunflower, what a nice surprise to see you come back and leave a detailed comment! :-)
DeleteYou make a good point. He has never known love since he never had it from his parents and he never had a good example. His dad was too busy treating him like shit and his dad didn't even stick around. All she really had was his younger brother, but he felt more responsible for him as parent since his dad was wasted most of the time. I agree, being with Lyn scared the shit out of him because for the first time in his life, he was treated with kindness, and he was taken care of. She cooked for him, she cleaned, she supported his dreams, she was basically his wife. At the same time, he saw it as weakness, and in the end, he got antsy. To him, being a man means never relying on anyone and never letting your guard down.
You are right, a child is a product of his/her environment. How can they not be when your parents are the first people that teach you how to be a human being. The simple presence or absence of a parent can be the difference between Brad and Luke. If Brad's dad had not been an alcoholic, he might be a different person. If his mother had been around, he might view women differently. Who knows? Sex and alcohol have always been Brad's security blanket. They take away the pain and they also give him a sense of control.
So you think he needs to get Luke back? Ooooh that's gonna be a tough one. Probably even tougher than getting Lyn back. Just for the simple fact that Luke has feelings for Lyn and he does't want her to get hurt again. But who knows? Maybe with time, Luke can forgive him too. After that fight with his dad, something definitely clicked in Brad's head. I think he started to see how he'll end up if he doesn't change.
Awww, you're starting to like him? Hopefull this won't be phase for him and he won't go back to his old way. It's funny because even though he's the most messed up out of the three, I feel the most connection with him.
Thanks for reading!
Why are you doing this Lyn? Are you trying to make us feel sorry for Brad? Hoping we will excuse his foul behavior because he had a rough childhood? Nope not gonna happen. Lots of people come from bad childhoods. He managed to do the right thing with bettering himself to get out of that situation, he knew right from wrong. He was just selfish, a big selfish bastard who now has to wallow in his mistakes.
ReplyDeleteHe'd better tell the truth. Forget saving his own ass, he'd better man up and tell the family he screwed their skanky daughter trying to be spiteful. He'd better be on his knees begging for forgiveness over him causing their daughter to run off and cut off contact.
LOL Mica, I'm not trying to get you to feel sorry for Brad. In fact, that's almost impossible to do considering what he did. I'm simply sharing his side of the story and what made him the type of person he is and how losing Lyn affected him as well. Nothing will ever excuse what he did to Luke and Lyn. He made his choices, and now he's dealing with the consequences. I agree, he was selfish. And he's realzing it now that he lost two of the most important people in his life.
DeleteIf he tells the truth, then that means he's putting Lyn's welfare about his own. That would be a sign of growth. Brad was the main factor in Lyn running off to another town but her family had something to do with it too. It's sad that Adam is the only person she felt she could confide in.
Thanks for reading!
I feel sorry for Brad's childhood and that he doesn't have a good relationship with his parents. However, that in no way excuses what he did to Lynn or to Luke! He made the choice to do those things, wanting to cause them pain no matter what the consequences!
ReplyDeleteI just read Jaz's comment as I'm writing mine! I agree completely!
I am in love with this story, Tommie!
I agree, having a rough childhood doesn't excuse what he did to Luke and Lyn. But it certainly influenced his motivations. He may not believe this, but he loves his dad. Otherwise he wouldn't have helped him out or showed concern. His dad may have been an abusive, alcoholic asshole but at least he never abandoned his children. Does that excuse his behavior? Of course not. But when you compare bad to worse...the worse makes you appreciate the bad.
DeleteLyn and Luke cared about Brad. But his behavior pushed them away.
Awww, thank you Daisies! I'm glad you're enjoying this story! :-)
All I heard was "waa, waa, waa I'm a selfish prick." Raise your hand if you're rooting for Adam to whoop that ass! MAN! And Pops joining in too! Maybe even kick the piss out of skankho! AWW MAN ADAM! You gotta come through for me on this one bud! He sits there and considers being selfish YET AGAIN because it's his "slice of normal"! Fucking arrogant asshole! HELLO you took that away from Lyn and want to have it for yourself? FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! I really hope he gets another beatdown real soon!
ReplyDeleteHe can try and blame his childhood all he wants! He can try and say hey I wasn't loved and have no idea what it means and make a million more excuses it all adds up to the same thing BULLSHIT! He knew he was in love with Lyn! He knew what those feelings meant when he was with her! He was just a selfish asshole THEN and NOW! I can't feel sorry for him. All this is doing is making me hate him more. He worked hard to become a doctor and get away from his life and then what? Wants to revert back to the child that was beaten and unloved when it suits him?
I can understand psychological scars or whatever but please! That excuse will only get you so far. You know how it feels to be hurt and you know how it feels to watch someone you love do those things to you! He knew EXACTLY what he was doing then and he caused his own hell. I hope he enjoys the view from the street when he goes to apologize again and sees Luke climbing inside that shit from 40 different angles and making her scream in pleasure!
FUCK YOU BRAD.
That is all :)
OMG, Adam whooping Brad's ass?? Is that even possible? I definitely see the possibility of Frank lunging at Brad if he finds out since that's two hof his daughters that he banged. lol That will not be a pretty sight. Naveah, on the other hand, might be bitch-slapped but we'll see. xD
DeleteHmmm...I'm getting the feeling that you're not too fond of Brad. Don't know why, just getting a hunch. :D Well, there's a reason why Brad was able to get through his shitty childhood and become a doctor in the end. He had to learn how to dig and claw his way to success just so he can finally move out of his dad's house and support himself. In fact, having a selfish need to make it is probably what prevented him from dropping out and becoming a junkie. That trait helped him professionally but bit him in ass in his personal life.
I honestly don't even think he's blaming his childhood for what he's done to Lyn and Luke. He's just reacting to his dad's personality. He blames his dad for treating him like shit and making him feel like shit, but that has nothing to do with what he did to Lyn and Luke. I don't even think he realized the correlation until afterwards. And I think he has every right to be angry at his father. He didn't deserve the abuse, the same way Lyn and Luke didn't deserve to be screwed over. But that's what happened, and he had to learn the hard way.
I agree that people who have been abused know how it feels to be hurt as well as witness a loved one get hurt. But that doesn't mean they're going to have remorse or automatically have the maturity to break the cycle. In fact, they tend to repeat what they know because it's the only way they feel some type of justice. Now Lyn and Luke screwing each other to spite Brad. Does that make it okay? It's still wrong since that's Luke's best friend, but do two wrongs really make a right?
I think its really interesting to hear people's take on this. And I love it! :D
Thanks for reading, Daijah!
"I want to tie up all the loose ends before moving on with my life completely."
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping this means he won't kill himself. I don't think so myself. I wonder what he plans on doing to move on with his life. Ugh, there was something else I wanted to say but that absentminded trait is showing its ugly head. Oh yeah!
He shows he has a core of steel under everything. Proof of that is that he held everything together instead of collapsing when his mom left. You never know how you're going to handle something like that until you're tested. Hum, just thought of something... he's a doctor cuz he still wants to make it all better?
I really hope he pulls everything back together again because I like Brad. Not for Lyn tho. I still want Lyn and Luke to get together cuz they didn't get to in that past life. Maybe he too needs a new town and a fresh start. "Memoirs Of A City Boy: Starting Over" hehe.
Brad kept himself together most of his life because of his brother but this is the first time he ever confronted his dad. And this is also the first time he lost the woman he loves and his best friend. So he's in a very vulnerable state right now. He can get away from it all by ending it or he can get away from it all by moving away.
DeleteLOL absentminded. That's so cute!
You know, you make a very good point about him having a core of steel. He could have easily used his mom's abandonment to fall apart, but he didn't. He chose to step up and care for his family instead. He's had to grow up way too fast and assume responsiblities that no child should have to bear, but that's what he did. Maybe on some level moving out of his father's house and becoming successful finally gave him the push to look out for his self-interest. He became a doctor because he never wanted to struggle again. But you bring up an interesting point about him wanting to make it all better. A way to fix himself perhaps? :-)
I like Brad too. I know most readers wish he would get hit by a bus, but there's something intriguing about him. I think he's the most complex character out of Lyn and Luke. He simply refuses to die. lol It would be nice to see Lyn and Luke get together in this life. At the same time, it makes me wonder what would happen if Lyn and Brad got back together. Would he continue to change or will he go back to his old ways? Decisions, decisions.
LOL "Memoirs Of A City BOy"!! I love it! Whoa, I can definitely see that story. :D
Thanks for reading, Mypal!
Hope everything is okay.
DeleteOh, and I finally joined blogger n have 3 stories going if you ever wanna see em (Elena is still going).
Miss your updates.
I feel bad that he had such a rotten life, but it's still no excuse for messing Lyn up like he did. Plenty of people have crappy childhoods & grow up to appreciate the good things, but sadly, plenty grow up to destroy them, just like he did. (Great song choice, as usual!)
ReplyDeleteHe might think about lying to Lyn's family to save his standing with them, but he's already lost his place there with his actions. And I see litle miss HO bag strolling into the room - maybe he won't have to say a word - maybe she'll say it all for him. Serves him right!
I still get a bad feeling that he's going to try & go back to Lyn's. I sure hope Luke makes sure that doesn't happen!
I know, a crappy childhood doesn't excuse his behavior but that's what he knows, and his motivations are influenced by that. I think it's even more unfortunate that parents take their resentments out on their children, not realizing how much damange they have inflicted until it's too late. Brad didn't deserve the abuse either, but that's what happened. I'm glad you enjoyed that song! It perfectly describes Brad's state of mind. I didn't start listening to Nirvana until recently but OMG, Kurt Cobain is just amazing! I can't believe he was around when I was in high school but I just thought he was too disturbed. lol
DeleteBrad has a chance to do the right thing for once, and act like a decent human being. The question is, is he prepared for what it will cost him? So you think Naveah will spill? Hmm...interesting.
Thanks for reading, Jilly!
Ahh, an update on my birthday! Once again I loved the update, keep em coming. Well I was half right so far, that was Brad's dad. I think that Lyn will be seeing Brad's face again.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday Kristine!! I hope you had a wonderful time, and your wish comes true. :wink:
DeleteI'm glad you enjoyed this update! Yes, you were half right. That was his dad, and he finally expressed how he felt after all those years. Hopefully that will be the wake-up call for his dad to change...and maybe they can finally find a way to repair their relationship. Now about the arson thing, that remains to be seen. lol
So you think Lyn is going to see Brad again? Hehe I guess we'll have to wait and see if you're right. :P
Thanks for reading!
Well this explains a lot. His Dad a drunk and beating his mother and that is why she left. I can understand that he hates his mother as I believe she should of taken him and his brother away from that situation.
ReplyDeleteHe now needs to tell the truth to the family about sleeping with the sister so his concious is clear, meaning he told the truth. He should also point out that the sister played her part as the parents need to know the truth and maybe whoop her ass as well for causing Lyn this pain.
Brad also needs to see Lyn once more to apologise and so she can see once and for all that there are no feeling left for Brad and it is Luke she really wants
I agree, his mom should have taken the boys when she left but she didn't. So Brad definitely resented her for that. Brad is at a point right now where he has choice between doing the right thing (telling the truth) or saving his own ass (keeping the lie). This is new territory for him.
DeleteIt would definitely help if the parents knew what was going on, especially how they differently they treat their daughters. Part of the reason why Lyn cut off contact with her family is the feeling that she didn't matter. Naveah also needs to have some type of consequence for her actions.
There's really no telling how she'll react when she sees Brad again. She loved him deeply, so it won't be that easy to just cut her feelings off.
Thanks for reading, Lckygrl!
If he'd told them what he did at that point, I have this feeling that her father and brother would have been the only ones upset. Her mother is just too close to the skank and would probably make some excuse.
ReplyDeleteI was worried she was going to turn around and have a pregnant belly but then again, they'd have to test the whole city to find the father.
Through this not only do we see why Brad is the way he is but also how much he has truly lost. He messed up and not just lost Lyn but possibly a family too.
OMG, Naveah pregnant?? If that happens, Brad just ruined whatever chance he had left with Lyn. That is just...heinous!! Then again, there's no telling how Lyn will react, I swear these characters have a mind of their own sometimes. lol Hahahaha test the whole city to find the father? Daaaamnn!! That's just scandalous :P
DeleteYes, I wanted you guys to see where Brad is coming from, and why he is the person that he is. I dont think he realized exactly how much he lost until now.
Thanks for reading, Qui!
I know i put a reply here. For some reason it didn't showup???.. HUM reread it, lol, maybe i did not reply. Anyways. Brad, is in a sort of a fix. First he takes care of a drunken father, though he would rather not. Yet he wants some sort of a family life, something he never had when he was growing up. Then to return a car to her folks, home? o my what is he getting himself into. Will he tell the truth or will he lie? He knows that lying is only digging himself in deeper, yet he also knows her sister may know why lyn left, and she stands there, like well are you gonna tell on us?
ReplyDeleteI feel for Brad, but he must learn whats really right and wrong, what will happen when you toss crap to the wind and let it fall where it falls.
This was sweet to see though, more insight to the man, his feelings, his thoughts, his fears, his anger. Yet he still is not fully getting it.
Maybe he will, then again maybe he will become his dad.
Yes, Brad never had a normal upbringing, and Lyn's (as well as Luke's family) gave him a sense of normalcy. He had to grow up FAST, on top experiencing the abuse going on in his home. The fact that he went to Lyn's family to return her car...knowing the risk, will put him in the position to choose: do the right thing or cover his ass. Knowing the truth, he has the power to help her family, as well as redeem himself.
DeleteI'm so glad you got to see more of who Brad is...thats what I wanted to portray. I'm not excusing what he did, but I just wanted to share it from his point of view. Will he get it? Who knows?
Thanks for reading Jerry!
I loved loved loved that Brad finally stood up to his dad! Geeze, if Brad is the prince of assholes, his dad is king. If there is one thing worse than an alcoholic wife-beater, it's an alcoholic wife-beater who thinks he's the victim and takes it out on his kids. That Brad was able to keep his family together and go on to become a doctor shows just how resilient he is.
ReplyDeleteI think my favorite part of this chapter was when Brad said he might not know the reasons his dad drinks, but he understands why someone would. That's a scary bit of insight for Brad -- what's to stop him from becoming just like his dad? Cheating on your girlfriend with her sister is probably a big step in that direction.
Oooh, Brad going back to Lyn's parent's house, though, reminded me that awful upbringing or no, Brad is still a bit slimy. You can just walk into that house, knowing you slept with both daughters and broke one of their hearts? If you want to be a good man Brad, and you really want to exorcise Lyn from you life, you better tell the truth. Admit to yourself -- and everyone else -- that you were the one at fault, and you'll be taking a big step back from being your dad.
(ever notice I tend to go off in tangents and address your characters like they can hear me? See, that's what a good writer you are -- you got me all worked up over Brad, for crying out loud!!)
"Geeze, if Brad is the prince of assholes, his dad is king."
DeleteHaha I know right? And the fact that his dad still thinks he's the victim, just shows how clueless he is to his part in the dysfunction of the family. Yes, Brad did keep his family together during his whole ordeal. He wasnt ready for the responsibility, but he felt like he owed it to his brother to step up. Seeing how much they struggled growing up, he wanted to make sure that will never happen again by becoming a doctor.
Yes, it is quite scary that he can become exactly like his dad. He has enough anger, bitterness and mistrust to resort to alcohol and let his life waste away. All his life, sex made him feel alive and alcohol numbed the emptiness he felt inside. Seeing the way his dad is...and what a waste he has become...may have given him a bit of a reality check.
Umm yeah, thats some balls to walk into Lyn's parents house after what he and Naveah did, and his responsibility in all this. He can do the right thing or only look out for himself. The choice is his. Hahaha I love it when you go into tangents and start yelling at my characters!! Especially Brad! lol Wanna know the scary part? I think they can really hear you. Haha! Cuz I sure as hell hear them..in my head...O.o
Thanks for reading and for the kind words Meghan!
Well, Brad definitely had a rough childhood! But he's still a dick!
ReplyDeleteIt was good for him to stand up to his Dad, maybe this will be the wake up call his Dad needs.
So, he went back to Lyn's parents house! I wonder what he'll tell them and I wonder if the sister will say anything. But then if she does that would ruin how her parents think of her.
Great chapter and I'm intrigued by what his plan could be!
Hahaha yeah Brad's a dick and its gonna take a lot for him to change. But yes, he finally stood up to his dad and let him know how he felt. I know that was a huge weight off his chest. I'm also hoping thats a wake-up call for his dad as well.
DeleteYou will find out what he does in Ch. 33, which I am working on. Stay tuned!
Thanks for reading Claireybear!
You my dear have given these characters life, I cried! I cried at several chapters! Please keep writing and giving these characters thier amazing voices.
ReplyDeleteHello Anonymous, welcome to my blog! Thank you so much for giving my story a chance and taking the time to leave a comment. Wow, I am touched that you cried...that is a writer's dream...to reach their readers emotionally. I have gotten attached to these characters with each chapter, and know them a little more. They feel very real to me, and I feel everything that they go through, to the point where I'm sobbing as I write. lol
DeleteIts feedback like this that made me come back from my long hiatus, to continue to give these characters their voices. And especially knowing that readers like you are connecting with them. I just cant give up on this story.
Thanks for reading, and for the kind words! :-)
What happened to you, you never write any more!
ReplyDeleteI have a new story I will soon be working on. Here's the link:
http://onmyownsims3.blogspot.com/
Anyone else can visit too and please tell all of your friends and readers!
Hey Rockingirl! What was originally a short break turned out to be a long hiatus, and I just never found that groove with this story again until now. So I'm slowly getting back into my blogs, eventually posting updates.
DeleteThanks for letting me know about your new blog, I'll be sure to check it out :-)
~ OK Lyn,are you there,hello...................
ReplyDelete~ I feel sorry for Brad at this point,he wants to set things right,he does not want to end up like his dad,that was a big wake-up call,it was like looking in the mirror at him self,(A future self!) when he confronted his Dad,not only did he confront his dad,& told him to get his Shit together,he knew,he was also berating himself,it was what he needed to get on with his life,as he messed up & has no-one to blame but himself,no matter how shitty his home life was,he had Luke's family,to tell him that there is something better out there for him, & I think it was striving to get that for himself,to better himself,that has always driven him,I do not think he would have gotten anywhere,with out the love off Luke's family to show him there is a better life out there for him!
~ Losing Luke was also like losing his family,as Luke's family knew his situation,& helped him,by showing him family love & normalcy!(Him & his brother were always welcome in their home!)
~ Now he has a big decision as to tell Lyn's family the truth,or lie!
~ He can lie & keep in contact with the only other normal family he has known,or he can tell the truth,to ease them,as they are taking Lyn's disappearance badly especially the father & brother,whom he respects & wants their approval,but he must tell them,so the blame lays with the right persons involved!Yes lyn's sister needs to own up to what she has done in all this!She is in no way innocent,she knew what she was doing was wrong,but it did not stop her!
~ If Brad tells the truth he can get on with his life,it would also show Lyn that he is growing up & taking his responsibilities seriously!
~ The only way he could ever win Lyn's love back,or respect is to set the record straight & own up to what he has done,he knows deep down this is what he must do,even though he knows he will never get Lyn's trust back,it is a step in the right direction!
~ If he just lets it slid,he has lost Lyn forever!
~ Even if he never gets with her again he knows he did the right thing, if he does not come clean he knows he can never go back,he can never be Luke's or Lyn's friend ever again!
~ I am hoping that you will come back soon & that you are OK! LUVS you girl!Missing you & this!(",)
Hi Karima! I always get giddy when I see your long comments, you have such great insight into the characters, and of course I love your enthusiasm. :)
Delete"Losing Luke was also like losing his family,as Luke's family knew his situation,& helped him,by showing him family love & normalcy!(Him & his brother were always welcome in their home!)"
You are right, not only did he lose Luke but he lost a family as well. A family he has known most of his life. They truly did help him and J.C. like they were blood, and loved them like their own, and showed him the love and support he's been lacking. Luke is more like a brother to him, and to lose that...really hit Brad. But despite all that, Brad continued to get sucked in by his selfishness, and in turn, ended up hurting those that love him the most.
Yes, doing the right thing will be Brad owning up to what he did and taking responsibility for his actions. But..its very risky. He may permanently sever his ties with Lyn's family if they find out what he did, and knowing he harbored precious information about her whereabouts this whole time. If he confesses, that means he's concerned about Lyn's welfare. If he doesnt, then he doesnt really care about her that much...and thats very telling. The choices is all his. But if he wants even an inkling of a chance of ever speaking to Lyn again, he needs to do the right thing. Otherwise, he will have permanently damaged his relationships.
Sorry for the long hiatus, but I am slowly getting back into my stories. First things first, gotta respond to comments. :-) Luvs you too! I miss writing, and cant wait to get into the groove of this story again. And catching up with other stories!
Thanks for reading!
I just wanted to let you guys know that I haven't given up on this story. RL has been crazy, and it has not allowed me the time to write the way I want. Now that summer vacation is here, I can finally work on my stories! Ch. 33 is loooong overdue. I will be working on it next week and hoping to release it soon.
ReplyDeleteI apologize for the lack of updates, but so touched by your recent comments, and for not giving up on me. I miss writing, and I miss you guys!
It's okay just take ur time. I have started my own story here at my blog: http://onourownsims3.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeleteplease visit and read my intro
leave a comment and participate in my poll!
thanks
Thanks for replying back Rockingirl! Hope you are doing well :-)
DeleteI hope everything is ok, miss your updates so much come back soon. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Lckygirl, thanks for your message! I am doing well, just got sidetracked and went on an extended break. Then I realized October 20 will the the anniversary for Memoirs, so I just couldn't let that go by without an update. A year ago, I posted my first chapter in the Pets forum when the EP came out. Since then, its been one hell of a ride with this story. lol
DeleteI miss writing too, and especially the characters, as well as their connection with the readers. You will be seeing their faces again soon. :-)
Hope you are doing well!